We put wigs on the statues to make them look like Mitt Romney.
I’m having second thoughts about this threesome.
I don’t want to have sex with all these people in our bedroom.
I’m a flying turtle!
I have a complaint.
Please get a smaller journal.
There’s a giant sea serpent in our swimming pool.
Here’s a picture of me in women’s underwear.
We put these skeletons together to make it look like they’re dancing.
You turned into a couch.
There’s a UFO right behind us.
Your ass is fucking huge.
We’re headless praying mantises.
I’m turning into a goat.
Did you feel that?
We’re being invaded, Gary.
Our living room corn stalks are coming in nicely.
It’s a bummer that my last patient got murdered on my couch.
We have bikes instead of wings.
Has the giant bird laid any eggs?
And this is our guillotine.
I’m wearing a fake mustache.
I have a stomachache — probably from eating all this stone.
They look surprised to see alligators riding the subway.
There’s a hippo in our living room.
Stop carving yourself into the hedges — it’s weird.
The doctors say it can’t be removed.
This one’s not in the field guide.
These people are delicious.
Gary won’t shut the fuck up.